Thursday 28 March 2013

Man Up!


'Every relationship has it's problems, but what makes it perfect is when you still want to be there when everything sucks!'I Came across this a lil while ago and I must say that this is my kind of Love... Over the years I've learnt that there is indeed more to love then the butterflies, romance and the whole whirlwind experience don't get me wrong, all that is necessary, but not always a realistic expectation, especially with Life's Responsibilities, like Work Deadlines, Bills to Pay and Raising Children...

This is why when two come together their basis has to be one of friendship, because in that comes trust, loyalty, respect and understanding... Today I want to focus on 'UNDERSTANDING',This is a fundamental factor when it comes to co-existing with someone, because their reactions and responses to certain things will make sense to you and you will learn with time how to respond. 'LEARNING' Your Partner is so key to achieving success in a relationship... One thing I've learnt about myself and from a number of isolated conversations I''ve had with different women in the past week, is that I like most opinionated women need a very Strong Man, because when a woman has opinions and her set ways and Standards, then in some if not most cases, the man can probably feel like he's never enough, because we can be critical and have expectations, which sometimes don't work in our favour, but I was raised by a STRONG! Man, who always spoke his mind and faced every situation and probably that's why though my folks didn't have a perfect marriage they stuck it out because they were both willing to be PRESENT to deal with issues as they arise, but I feel like our Generation is dealing with men who'd rather take FLIGHT! then FIGHT! I mean how many single, beautiful and hard working Mommy's do you know? And if you do the research their men left for no valid reason really, but simply because they wanted a woman who would sit back silently and be content with whatever even if it didn't meet her standards, instead of talking the man will come home a lil later that night drunk ofcourse, sleep in till you've probably left, then won't see him again until late and that cycle goes on until he hopes you've calmed down! cheat you with sex and dinner and treats, but never really having the necessary conversations...

C'mon!! I'd rather a man who when am upset will boldly come home! and if he finds me upset or arms in the air! then sit me the heck down! and talk to me like a grown man! and tell me where your coming from, then tell me your the man of the house and set some ground rules... Yes even in this Gender Rule era there is still nothing sexier than a man who can take charge of His household; you will gain my respect, and that will result to you feeling loved and appreciated and in turn you will love me even more, because I will treat you like the King you are! But fleeing each time there is a problem and only returning when all is well is such a sign of immaturity and can drive any woman up the wall!! And infact she will start to bully you, just to get a response, and the more you ignore the more she persists, until she get's some reaction from you that doesn't involve fleeing, but fighting actually signifies their is something worth fighting for! So word to the wise... Men take Charge of your homes! and your homes will not break!! Women will not need to look elsewhere or seem so unhappy no matter what you do, but ofcourse it is important to point that it makes it easier if your like minds, same vales and similar backgrounds with loads in common... The adage that goes 'Opposites Attract' is a falacy... Likeness=Happiness!!

1 comment:

  1. I have come to understand that one cannot know how to love me unless they have experienced God's love.

    Gods love comes with all those fruits that you mentioned in the previous blog titled "love is".
    Human love has limits there are some things we cannot stand for however God's love has no limits and is so beautiful.

    God does not tolerate me or listen to me only when i come down, he is there with me in the mess of things through my tantrums to him or tears or selfish moments.

    Because of his unfailing love for me i am able to be a better person and i am also able to love somebody with the same respect.
    Having received God's forgiveness, grace, mercy, provision and comfort, I have experienced the greatest love ever known in Human kind.

    So begs the question, if i have experienced the greatest love there is, then what can a man show me? The answer for me is that the one that i shall marry is to represent God's love to me and i too will be an example of God's love to him. And together we show each other God's love and share and experience the Greatest love known to mankind.

    God is love, if a man is not loving his woman, he definitely needs to check his relationship with God and fix it. When things are not going right in our lives i have learnt that the first place to check things is our obedience to the almighty. When we fix things with God all other things falls into place.

    I could not agree with you more that there has been a huge lie telling people that opposites attract. As stated by Pastor muriithi from mavuno church in the series 'finders keepers', e.g people with addictions tend to be attracted to people who are codependent. They think they may be opposites but they are the same, unhealthy people attract other unhealthy people.

    I also agree very much that when looking for a partner we should share the same values and as you stated, this can only be found through friendship first. I don't believe there is any other way really.

    People get cheated by feelings and believe the butterflies are enough to proceed with the vows. Feelings are just that, feelings. I can feel angered but i am aware i should not act on it. Thus usually i can like how somebody makes me feel, however i shouldn't confuse this feeling of liking the way he makes me feel to be love.

    Thus if a man "God's up" he will definitely know how to "man up".

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